- - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
winter
garden
tiny
grave beds
(tu)lips
are whispering,
“come,
spring”
- - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
tracing
her scars
like
braille, mouthing,
I
lived
to
tell
©
2015 Jennifer Wagner
For
dVerse, the tenWord, a form created by Brian Miller.
I especially like the darkness of the second one.. but as a pair the first one gives hope as well.
ReplyDeleteoh i whisper along the tulips... can't wait until spring spreads its colorband across the world again...the second one has a great intensity
ReplyDeleteBoth of these are so different, both beautiful in their own way. The second, I can relate to--the first, love the grave beds and promise.
ReplyDeleteBoth make me think of living the moment.
ReplyDeleteGreat imagery in the first one. And the second is intense and powerful.
ReplyDelete-HA
Wonderful word play in your first one, Jennifer. And, ha, it will be a little while before tulips get their wish!!! Smiles.
ReplyDeletedang. so much feeling packed into that first one...the grave beds esp....
ReplyDeletesame with the second one....solid pieces...
Love the first one because I, too, long for spring to come. But that second one offers hope is such a different, and deeper, way. Nice job. Peace, Linda
ReplyDeleteI like the tu-lips in the first, and the scars like braille ~ So well done ~
ReplyDeleteOh I so like what you've done with the form.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the first one waiting for the arrival of spring through frozen ground.
ReplyDeleteVery different but both very evocative poems. In the second I also like the layout and how it reinforces the image.
ReplyDeletevery good what you've done with just ten words!
ReplyDeleteI like how these go together: whispering and mouthing. and so striking/memorable, especially "grave beds" and "tracing her scars like braille."
(tu)lips... very clever.... and I loved the tracing of scars; you def made it...
ReplyDeleteI loved the second one the most, reminds me of my dear husband, who brags that his "scars" are his tattoos!
ReplyDeleteboth beautiful - the 2nd stunningly so
ReplyDeletewow - the last really touched me
ReplyDeleteThere is so much yearnings and anticipation in the first one! Great lines Jennifer!
ReplyDeleteHank
longing for spring in 10 words... nice... and the second interesting how you gave it form
ReplyDeleteVery well done--the braille one is especially compelling. Thanks. This is Manicddaily from wordpress! So many problems commenting these days. K.
ReplyDeleteYes, the braille poem is very powerful. Excellent. I won't look at my garden the same way this winter, either--grave beds, wow. Thank you for these
ReplyDeleteThe second one . . . wow.
ReplyDeleteOh, that Brian Miller. Brilliant! I'm gonna have to try this, Jennifer.
ReplyDeleteYour concise words are spectacular.
Both have different imagery but are connected with 'hope'
ReplyDeleteI like the double meaning you achieved by writing (tu)lips
ReplyDeletedamn, Jen ~
ReplyDelete