Ding! Ding! Ding!
Congratulations!
You’ve won a
Colonoscopy!
Mammogram: check. Results are normal
but let’s have another check.
Blood draw: check.
Menopause: check, check, check.
Hot flashes! That’ll treat the cold of
all these needles and machines
and thinning skin.
An MRI, too! What fun!
All those joyous sounds!
Cervical spondylosis
is as sublime as it sounds,
so let’s strap this cage to your face
to keep the party going while we’re at it!
You didn’t hear that? Oh, it’s just as well.
Forgot your readers? That’s OK, too.
Can’t remember?
You won’t want to, anyway—
but enjoy!
We’re just getting started with you!
© 2025 Jennifer Wagner
What Cold Is at What’s Going On