clouded leopard

image:  wikimedia commons

at the zoo

for me

there is only

the clouded leopard

pacing

its fishbowl cage.

her sad eyes,

her muscles, taut—

excruciating

to be on display.

now, this isn’t popular

or proper.

come on, baby.

let us see you,

exploit you,

measure you.

we’ll feed you, promise.

you don’t want to be gregarious?

on facebook?

you must have your head

and spots examined.

there’s a reason

she climbs,

the best at it of her kind—

she’s designed to be

reclusive.

by day

she wants to rest

among the trees

and hunt at night,

elusive.

hidden

she keeps her pelt and cubs

and her sanity.

break the glass

and let her out, let her out—

she’s me.

© 2014 Jennifer Wagner

Linking with other poets at Poets United:  The Poetry Pantry this weekend.

Prattle

Her meditative muse

drifted

in the prattle of hens,

struggled 

to make conversations

of import 

about the topics

they found consuming.

She tried to play

but the game

regarded her with suspicious eyes,

distrusted her

for the disinterest.

Copyright © 2013 Jennifer Wagner

I try, I try, I try!  I am getting better at small talk…though at times it is challenging to do so.  I am learning to lighten up a bit, the fate of the world not actually being in my hands and all…  I am also learning that I am not the only one to have this problem!  Apparently many introverts find gab for gab’s sake difficult as well.  Chatter saturation drains me, and although I want to connect with people, I’ll find myself checking out. *‘Introverts react more strongly to stimulus and therefore need much less of it or they rapidly become overstimulated.’  We like to savor the juicy bits; extroverts like to consume large quantities, so to speak.  If you think this might be you or someone you love I recommend Susan Cain’s book:  Quiet: The Power Of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking, a really great book that helps in the understanding of some of the differences among us.

*quote from www.psychologies.co.uk/self/revenge-of-the-introverts.html  Additional good info there as well. 

www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/introversion  Fun quotes for those interested.

For the prompt by the very talented Kim Nelson at Poets United:  Voices. 

Introversion Is Not a Disease, Disorder, or Handicap

There are things we do because of the way we are, not in spite of them.

Near the end of 2006 I suffered my second miscarriage.  I’d had caring family and friends come by; offering condolences, wrapping me in big hugs, offering words of sympathy and encouragement, and bringing flowers and goodies.  All well-meaning, and all appreciated. 

In the evening as I was sitting alone on my bed quietly grieving, my then 6 year old son, Clint, came into the room.  He climbed gently onto the bed and took my hand.  He had an aura of peace and concern; and as he sat silently holding my hand, tears trickled down my cheeks.  We sat there together for several long minutes, holding hands, in the quiet.  He was not uncomfortable with the silence or my falling tears.  He didn’t even ask any questions.  He simply understood.  He knew that sometimes there are no words; and that's ok, there needn't be any.  His intuitive, introverted temperament allowed him to just be with me in that moment and it healed me more than any spoken word.  After a few minutes more I whispered “thank you,” he nodded purposefully, climbed off the bed and left the room.  I smiled and shook my head.

It was pure genius.