Tuesday, April 30, 2013

In Bed Together, Alone (Into Me See)



There was always a little booze
to get the tongue loose,

and sex
to bridge the bodily gap.

But once all the highballs
were emptied,

and they cracked the night
with a breath of sunlight,

bare skin prickled
against the the hollow-boned touch

of dying whispers
too hoarse to rise above

what they never said.



© 2013 Jennifer Wagner




“Partners in a relationship can begin to lose their romantic and sexual passion for each other when they begin showing less and less of their true feelings to each other. This lack of ongoing "into-me-see" can occur because of fear of how the other person will react, lingering resentment, or simply emotional laziness. Much like tending a garden, ongoing intimacy requires persistent effort, but in both cases the fruit that blooms as a result of such loving dedication is well worth the effort. It is quite possible for two people in a relationship to continue to grow as individuals who are capable of revealing ever-deeper aspects of themselves to their partner. In this way there are always new qualities of a person to be known and loved, which is the best insurance for maintaining sexual passion no matter how long the couple has been together.
The quality of your life is enhanced immeasurably by developing and maintaining relationships with people who you allow deeply into your heart, mind and soul. Remember that secrets and emotional isolation are the enemies of intimacy. The ability to be intimate with another person is like a muscle that becomes weak when it is under-exercised. Use it or lose it!” –Bill Herring LCSW, CSAT

"The opposite of loneliness, it's not togetherness. It is intimacy." -Richard Bach


34 comments:

Brian Miller said...

wise words in your footnotes...intimacy begins well before touch...and often it starts with communication...its the things unsaid that def scare me most in life....

Margaret said...

Last three stanzas are just so amazing... the whole poem is, actually. So true, so true.

Lisa A. Williams said...

This is a truly remarkable poem, such truth in each line, Without expressing one's true feelings, there is no intimacy in a relationship.

Claudia said...

much wisdom in this...sex and intimacy are def. two different pairs of shoes and ideally they walk hand in hand, one making the other deeper and richer

Wolfsrosebud said...

... a lifetime of work

Anonymous said...

There are so many more ways to be intimate than sex; it's such a shame that our culture is obsessed with sex alone.

Lovely poem.

Pat Hatt said...

So very very true in the footnotes, so many people are just plain lazy and expect it to be there.

Grace said...

I appreciated the process notes ~ Intimacy is hard work ~

anthonynorth said...

Excellent and wise words.

Anonymous said...

that holow boned touch always makes us prickle

nano birthing chamber

Jody Lee Collins said...

Jennifer, what a remarkable way via verse to share such valid truths....excellent job.

TALON said...

I loved the layers in this...like peeling back the covers to peer into someone else's bed...and the most intimate parts of their lives.

brudberg said...

This wisdom is true, but still so hard to live by.

Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger said...

A wonderful was to express this truth!

Anonymous said...

Jennifer!, I like. A true representation of this scene - the act - the unspoken words were the loudest. One of my favs. Excellente!

Anonymous said...

Nicely done. And an excellent point.

RMP said...

such a sad reality. you definitely touched on it quite beautifully...

Wendy Bourke said...

Where there is love, I think, it can take a lot more effort to block growth than to go with it. Sadly, that is a truth that is not always apparent when feelings get hurt.

ayala said...

Wise words, so true.

Mary said...

Jennifer, both your poem and your footnotes are profound. So much thought, and so much truth.

kaykuala said...

Use it or lose it!” –Bill Herring LCSW, CSAT

Truly said but many do not care! It only benefits the matrimonial lawyers! Nicely Jennifer!

Hank

Unknown said...

great poem. I love the"tongue loose" and "bridge the bodily gap" wow....how true.

Jules
A Dose of Jules

emmett wheatfall said...

Truly beautiful and erotic. But not in a lewd way, but in the great tradition of fabulous poetry. A wonderful piece of poetry. I spoke to me.

kelvin s.m. said...

...very well said my friend... a relationship is nothing if only one is exerting effort... but then i understand that in a relationship you have to surrender yourself though not in all cases coz it def has to be in moderation fairly enough to the extent by which the relationship is not being sacrificed too much... smiles... i enjoyed it... thanks...

TCPC said...

very true and very well put. The challenge is to keep the spark alive!

Vishwas Anand said...

Wise and interesting! The key is to communicate while leaving nothing important unsaid, well written :) http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/provoking-hearts-and-minds/2012/aug/25/noteworthy-rote/

flaubert said...

If both partners don't try, it will never last. Very eloquent write.

Pamela

Anonymous said...

What an insightful poem! I love the explanation you've added.

Linda Rogers said...

The images you create in this poem, bring me to a lonely, empty place where love no longer resides. Great write.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

It is true that we become lazy in our intimacy - sexual or otherwise.

Wise footnotes - footnotes to take heed of.

Anna :o]

Rosemary Nissen-Wade said...

I think it's an excellent poem, and I really like the quotes too.

Todd Alan Kraft said...

I didn't think you needed the explanation at the end of it. The poem said it quite clearly.

Optimistic Existentialist said...

I loved the ending. Was what was never said "I love you" ?

Fireblossom said...

Sounds like they said a lot, but it wasn't what anyone would want to hear.