Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Snow like Eiderdown

When death comes
you find yourself trying to catch up to it,
to face facts,

like pulling on a winter coat
when the cold has already
bitten you clean through
and all that’s left is
dark acceptance.

You’ve had the denial,
the anger,
the bargaining,
the depression.

Now, you’re hunkering down
with no more Why God on your tongue.
You’ve realized what a colossal waste of time
that has proven to be,
as some questions
simply remain unanswered—
to your suffering.

But you pray, anyway.
Breathe in – sharp pain.
Breathe out – cry.
Breathe in – dull pain.
Breathe out –

a season of counted breaths
you decided to take in spite of the ache.
One broken foot in front of the other,
wincing as you wait.

For what?  You don’t know, but—






somehow bringing
a small peace, a light comfort
in the way of things.

You watch children
catch flakes on their tongues,
listen to giggles
and excited chatter
as they toss snowballs,

and soon realize
isn’t silent anymore.

© 2013 Jennifer Wagner

For the Poetry Jam prompt:  What Brings You Comfort?  Snow is comforting to mewatching it fallthe way it settles, covers everything, and of course watching kids play in it. 

I’ve been in Las Vegas for my son’s baseball tournament so it’s great to be back and see what I’ve missed.  Looking forward to making rounds and catching up with what you all have written!


Vandana Sharma said...

:)love the way of presentation

Brian Miller said... def capture a bit of the journey through grief...from the anger and hurt, to understanding and hearing heaven once more....really nicely done jennifer....

revelations said...

wonderful write,, with a ray of light at the end...

alan1704 said...

A journey into hope with a forlorn feeling of gravity in there. Quite beautiful

Janet Martin said...

I could feel this going from dark to light! Love, love, love your last line! The days when the light doesn't come on; those are the hard ones, yes, but we press on knowing the Light is there.

Unknown said...

I love watching rain and snow falling! Isn't it nice when coming out of our pain, opening our eyes to what's around us, can bring comfort?

Laurie Kolp said...

This is so beautiful, Jennifer. Thank you.

Mary said...

Love your reflections, Jennifer. I do think sometimes heaven seems to be silent, but then once again out of the stillness comes the comfort that was sought. Hope your son did well with his tournament.

Gabriella said...

I like your expression of raw grief and the feeling of hopelessness we perceive until snow begins to fall. It does have a soothing and comforting effect somehow.

Wendy Bourke said...

A beautiful, poem, Jennifer, and so evocative of the grieving process. The title is lovely and perfect - and has come to my mind several times today.

janetld said...

This is so good - poignant, relatable, inspirational, v. well-written. Love the title too. I'll surely come back to read this again.

ND Mitchell said...

Got to say, this is quite a journey you take us on with snow as the conclusion/new beginning. A lovely piece of writing Jennifer and welcome back too!

Sarav said...

Jennifer, what a potent poem, first gut wrenching and then softly unfurling and the light shines--perfect ending! Welcome back :-)

Mary Ann Potter said...

The snow imagery is very powerful. A beautiful poem --- thoughtful and introspective without being the least bit maudlin.

Anonymous said...

Picturesque write. It is like magic how little things can ease pain and suffering.